My Friday night spent in the bath..

I'm sitting in the bath tub sweating out all of the sickness. My roommate has been coughing EVERYWHERE so I'm trying to prevent getting her illness. The last two days I have taken a very large amount of vitamin C..maybe enough to even over dose on. I have also been drinking large amounts of fluids and sleeping a lot. I will be damned if I get sick for spring break which starts next Friday. I'm going to Canada and I will be on the prowl of cute breaded dudes and where better to look than Canada where it's freezing! Also, I don't mind that I'm not going to Mexico like 98% of the rest of people because I don't really feel like getting kidnapped and being a sex slave for a bunch of mexicans. Plus me in a swim suit might scare everyone off. Okay I'm sweating and feeling a little light headed. Time to drink more fluids, take my religion test, and then jump in the bath again. God, what a great friday night! I will be blogging later, trust me.

pruny salt. 

kryptonite: week 1

Contrary to popular belief, I am not a superhero. Although 9 out of 10 kindergartners perceive me to be Super Girl, I have my weaknesses. So, I have decided to divulge said kryptonite to you, dear reader.


I totally can't get enough of the NYPD Daily Crime Blotter. Oh man! It's so good. The story up today is about how this duo of gangsters mugged a couple in their thirty-somethings. Alright, sounds like a typical Flatbush story, but it gets better: one of the guys was named Short Man.

Short Man. Oh, hell yeah. But nothing compares to the story of Licorish. I've never been to Jamaica, Queens, and I never intend to, but if I ever do...oh my God, I really hope I meet Licorish.

Alright. Now you know one of my MANY weakness.

I have to go rescue a puppy out of a tree, or something now.


SuperPepz!

sorry I just don't like you...

       We all have those stars that when you see them on tv or in a movie or in a interview you just want to strangle...well I do anyways.  Their just annoying and you feel if you saw them in real life you'd probably go up to their face and tell them how annoying they are. The star that does it for me is Evan Rachel Wood. Okay so she's been in movies like Running with Scissors, Across the Universe, and The Wrestler. Big whoop. She's fucking obnoxious. And if you ask me I don't think she's that great. She's 21 and was dating Marilyn Manson who is 40, she is awesome. A.) who the hell would find Marilyn Manson attractive B.) ew and C.) Dita Von Teese wannabe much? I can't stand here. Don't believe me check it out yo. Sorry Evan Rachel you ain't no Dita Von Teese! After breaking up with Marilyn rumor was she was dating Mickey Rourke. The only thing I can think of is she is some-what retarded or blind. I guess she couldn't go very long without a man to share her lipstick with though... at the Vanity Fair Oscar party she was with Manson again and the two are together again. Well enjoy wearing black dear and banging a 40 year old that isn't anywhere near attractive. What am I saying, do whatever I don't really like you. 

xx,

miss. salt.

how to look like a million bucks when your ankle is sprained

all photos by Frank J. Baran taken at Brooklyn College 2/19/09



-miss pepper

video of the minute

pepper's new obsession.

ps the song is so good for public transit. going over the east river? this song. walking to the end of the platform? this song. lazing about? this version of same song:

procrastinating is my hobby.

YO! it's 2:10 a.m here and I have an art history test tomorrow at 12 ! What time did I sit down to start studying? 9:00, right after Heros. Since then I've done everything BUT study! So what have I done since then you ask? Went to Starbucks to get some studying fuel, was closed so I bought chocolate instead at a near by gas station. Decided I still needed coffee so stopped at a local coffee place called Ejoy. Took movies back to Blockbuster for Chelsea. Updated my Twitter 100 times. Thought Taco Bell sounded good got a crunch wrap supreme and sat in a liquor store parking lot with Chelsea talking about the weekend and feeling like I was going to vomit for an hour. Came back to the apartment almost threw-up again but ate the rest of my crunch wrap supreme instead. Sat on twitter even more and now for the last hour/two hours have been making stupid but funny facebook videos for people. I dressed up as Ja Rule for one, I am a hard ass. I've decided I'm not going to yoga in the morning instead I'm going to study probably a bad call but I suck at life and at studying. Therefore non of the shit I put in my body will be going away until Thursday when I have yoga again. Also, I think one of my bike tires are flat. fuckkk. Oh and to add to the list I just made this blog. Maybe I'll start studying.. now!?

Ugg, and maybe I'll throw-up too. 

 (picture of me as Ja. Rule above, obviously.) 

saltz. 

Pepper's Perfect Weekends: First Edition

Man, sorry, guys. I've been off and on my grind. But I had a really awesome weekend. I always do, yo. So let's recap.


On Friday, my roommate and I were on The List at Kanye's new club, Mr. West. We took a car there with the cutest effing driver ever, Luisa. I told her I wanted to cast her in my film as a santeria woman. She laughed all the way over the Williamsburg Bridge. It was so good. She sang "Celebration" by Kool and the Gang. Jesse tried to get her to come in with us, but sadly she had to return to driving people around.

So after standing outside waiting for our friend, the promoter, to come fetch us, we finally got in. This was my first time being on the list instead of seating people on it....this past AugustI did a stint at Highline Ballroom as a bottle girl. Needless to say, I knew how the club worked, but I was gonna let myself enjoy it.

Well, first of all, wow. Black everywhere, lights galore, leather banquettes, celebrity sightings. I met Keenyah from America's Next Top Model. I remember remarking how unremarkable the GoGo dancers were, and how much better we were. Keenyah was so nice and wore a gigantic fur hat.

Last Night's Party was lurking around. I'm a bit worried about my black lamé leggings and the flash and the inevitable undie shot. Oh GOD. I'm also worried about the picture of me making my roommate drop his screwdriver on some Jersey bitches' head ending up on Gawker. Do I care? Not really. I also accidentally burned Lilly Donaldson with my cigarette. Oops.

Anyways, we headed home kind of early. Mostly because my liver was beginning to hurt. So, my roommate and I threw our drunk asses into a cab. There's one part of the night that really sticks out to me. We were somewhere in SoHo. Maybe it was The Village. It was unimportant at the time, but we were at a stoplight. Anyways, I spotted a man and a woman on the corner, speaking to each other in sort of strange terms. The woman looked like she was gonna cry, so I rolled down the window and yelled, "KISS HER! KISS HER!" over and over again.

Soon, Jesse joined in on the yelling, and the man kissed her. The man grabbed her by the face and kissed her. We cheered and as the cab pulled away, we were still kissed. That moment will stick with me for the rest of my life, and I hope for them as well.

We went home. I did my usual two-bottles-of-gatorade-and-a-handful-of-ibuprofen deal. I also ate an entire pizza and drank three cups of tea. Passed out and then SATURDAY CAME.

On Saturday, I woke up and called my friend. I decided to take Charlie on an adventure to one of my favorite places in Manhattan: 77th and Lexington.

77th and Lex is one of the most magical places in the world. You're surrounded by all the things that make the city the city. Anyways, there's a yummy deli called "Hot N Crusty" (it's a chain but the pizza is bangin') and a puppy store and a candy store called "Heavenly Delights". Charlie and I ate pizza and looked at the cutest pups in the world and bought candy.

Oh man, let me tell you: green sour belts, candy pomegranates, peanut butter malt balls, salty licorice, licorice allsorts, sour fruit salad, candy rocks. I have a real weakness for candy, and at $6.50 for a half pound of it? Yeah. Can't get enough.

After we got our sugar fix, we walked to the park. Everyone was out, after all, it was a beautiful day. And so, we walked. We walked past and in the dried-up boat pond. We walked past carriages and bikers and families, past the Alice in Wonderland statue, pedicabs and fountains. We walked past a proposal by the reservoir and watched it happen, the knee, the kiss, the ring going on. That made me happy. We walked past the douchey rich kids home on spring break talking about facebook, we walked past baby strollers and Eastern European tourists and all the way into the Upper West Side. I'll tell you, I have a real love for uptown Manhattan, especially the West Side.

We ended up on 72nd, so I figured...why not hit up Riverside Park? If you're not familiar with Riverside Park, get acquainted. Yes, it's a view of New Jersey. But more importantly, it's just length and lengths of beautiful shoreline. We hit up my buddies Roger and Roli at West and headed all the way down to Riverside Drive, right by Trump Towers.

We walked to the end of the pier and watched the sun begin to sink into the river. Cold, windy, totally no fun for someone who lives in an incubator of a room like me. But was it pretty? Totes.

The rest of the night was sort of unremarkable compared to the walking adventure we went on. It consisted of ordered chinese from my favorite place EVARR. General Tso's for him, scallion pancake and bao buns for me. Oh, and besides Chinese, it also involved Ghostbusters and discussing how different Jewish (mine) and Catholic (his) families are.

I went home at a reasonable hour, 1:30, attempted reaching all my friends. They were all in Bushwick and we know mama don't go past the Lorimer stop. So I passed out. What's a better way to end a perfect day than an extra few hours of sleep in the morning?

Don't answer that, you sick bastard.

So that, my dears, was my weekend. What's in store for this one? Another Mr. West night, that's a given, and my classmate's birthday party in DUMBO. Bringin' mad heads for both.

Oh yeah, and working on that Kubrick paper.


-miss pepper

UGLY !

high light of my life?

At this after party with some of Sara's friends. This mexican starts to try to start this fight with this wasted kid. I jump in and I'm like you guys need to leave before the cops come. The mexican dude Pinto, yes that's his real name and all his amigos are trying to get him in the car to leave. While a group of the other guys from the party are trying to continue to add more full to the fire. This mexican dude is being totally rude and had been all night. For christ sake he was a pig! He was slapping girls asses when they walked by him.. not cool dude. So they finally get him in the car and I yell "See-ya ugly!" he then replies back "ginger slut!!" I then yell "well at least I'm not ugly!!" pretty much high light of my night.. or life. Sorry Pinto you're just an ugly ass. (note: not a real picture of Pinto above, sadly.)

saltz, the ginger. 

Things I Lyke !!

My favorite youtube video EVER!

I watch it all the time!!

It never gets old!

My mother watches it like 3 times a day, seriously. 

favorite part.. "I want beef jerky! I want pie!" 

"I'm her mom, NO SHE'S NOT!"

okay.. watch it and love it!

saltz.

UGG.

I feel like shit. Last night we rented movies and I decided I wasn't going to drink. Things changed and Chelsea and I started doing shots of Sky vodka chased with boons farm. Oh god I was drunk within 45 minutes. Bad idea. I woke up this morning thinking my heart was going to beat so fast I was going to die. Lorrrrd. Then the football player who lives next to us came over wasted and fell asleep on our living room floor. Awesome. He probably weighs 260 and is 6'1.. he's big. So now I'm watching Millionaire Match Maker on Bravo. I like this show, I won't lie. And in a few hours I'll be getting ready to go to my friend Sara's birthday party. I'll probably drink and get drunk again even though at this moment I feel if I had one more drink of alcohol I'd die. I look back at how much I use to drink in high school and I'm like how the hell did I do that? Signs of me getting older. ha. 

On Peps last post.. I seriously thought about getting one of Dali's elephants tattooed on me. I lovvvvve his work!! Oh and I wanna hear more about the Mr.West party!! Spill about it all seester! Who said you reminded them of Audrey Hepburn ?! I'm dying to know! Also, is NY bumpin' right now with fashion week? Any celeb spottings? 

Okay time to come out of this coma ..to the shower I go!

saltz.

listen up

The day before my parents moved me to New York two years ago, my dad looked me straight in the eye and said: "I will personally wring your neck if you get tattooed or pierced inappropriately before we are done paying for your education". That was the worst idea ever, dude.

I now find myself aching to get a small, brown heart on the crook of my left elbow. The idea is that it would look like a freckle. The meaning? I wear my heart on my sleeve. More than that, it's for my grandpapa. I lost my grandpapa in 2004. For each family member that dies, I will get another heart. The final meaning? My first play, the first real, completed, long piece of work was titled "love each other", ie...people wearing their heart on their sleeves. I don't know if I'll ever do it, but it'll mean a lot.

I've always wanted a light blue feather on my right shoulderblade, too. For my roots in Missouri- the bluebird is the state bird after all. But also 'cause I'm into flyin' about and doin' my own thing. I don't wanna be caged. Can't love a wild thing. Give me a break , guys, I just spent the last 3 hours in the VIP section at Mr. West. Thoughts are not clear right now.

Like I said about both tattoos: I probably won't get them 'til later on in life when I'm not leeching off my parents. Tats are not about fashion for me. For me, they're things that stay around forever. I think wearing your heart on your sleeve and loving your freedom are two things I want to stick to me, literally, to the day I die.

Okay. Seriously. Give me a break.


anyways.

All I want is something simple. Cheap. Classic. I don't need an elaborate tattoo or anything. It's more like I just don't have the balls to. But Salt does. I liked all the ones she picked out, too. But here are some suggestions:
dali's elephants, dali is my absolute favorite painter EVARRR after kandinsky. anyways get these elephants tattooed on you. one on each forearm over the crook of your elbows. that would look HOT.


this is my favorite piece by one of my favorite graffiti artists, Miss Van. oh man i love the doe. cute girl opitional.


I really think this one is it, though, Salt.



-pepz

A WEAVE CAN SAVE YO LYFE !

Only in Kansas City Missouri would some shit like this happen. 

This girl it gonna be on Tyra you just wait !

I'd bet money on it!

Salt.

LOLZ

Pepz I know exactly what you mean! Such a great photo of us!So vintage! haha. I think that's the longest my hair has ever been and check out my brace face, damn I was a hot scene chic ! ha, I kid, I kid! So glad the bar-ban didn't happen until I got out of high school. What would I have done with my life? Every weekend spent at the Rockwell smoking turkish royals and trying to convince my friend Nathan who worked around the corner at the small grocery store to sell me alcohol. good times. good times. Note the picture above, hair barrette, spider-man shirt, and awesome pose. Laugh all you want, I did.

Moving on..when I woke up this morning I thought it was Saturday and freaked. Then I remembered that I drank large amounts of pbr and sky vodka and realized it was only Friday ! SCORE! I love it when things like that happen. I think I'm going to lay in bed for a few hours and recover then go bike and shoot. Sounds awesome I know. Oh last night I made lasagna while we were all drunk! ... Okay I put the frozen lasagna that came in a box in the oven. But still for someone drunk that can still be a challenge! 

Just so you know I'm listening to the mix you made peppa and memories.. I still like it !! (and always will!)

kisses, 

salty. 

how about i'm outside of your window?

Oh dude, I'm on such an emo kick. It's awful. Maybe it explains why I've been feeling so freaking crazy lately. My bangs have grown out to a side-swept mess, I'm blowing them out of my eyes constantly. I sing Saves the Day at the top of my lungs and sleep soooo much. Why am I acting like a friggin' 17-year-old?

Who knows, I'll grow out of it after I finish dying my hair black, cutting up my favorite t-shirts and getting drunk at the next Caffeine Kills show. Yo Salt, back me up on this. You were more of a BOAD girl, but still.

AND WILL YOU TELL ALL YOUR FRIENDS, YOU GOT YOUR GUN TO MY HEADDDDDD?

Okay, on a more serious note, let's talk high school "alt" stereotypes. When Salt and I were in high school, the big counterculture thing was being scene. For God's sake, we met through the friggin' scene. Oh, Springfield.

Neither of us are very involved in the scene, but here's how it went when McSaltay and Peppaz were in high school:

-The place to be was DOWNTOWN. During the summer, we'd all sit on the square, smokin' cigs (turkish royals of course!) and shootin' the shit. Otherwise, there were plenty of shows to see. This was before the bar ban, of course. But yeah- Benefit of a Doubt, Herestoyou, The Social, Caffeine Kills...what else am I missing? I think I had a crush on like, at least one member of each band.

-Mudhouse. Even though I worked at the competition, Emack & Bolio's, Mudhouse was the place to be seen...in the scene. Who were you without that ubiquituous clear cup and black straw? no one. exactly.



-Facebook wasn't even around then. MySpace, baby, full of self-taken photos, photoshopped to hell and signs. MySpace whores, I can't even believe they still exist, yo. I actually took the trouble of going though my blogs and deleting some particularly embarassing ones.

-Boys wearing girl jeans. Straightened hair. Girls wearing shitloads of beads. Little girl barrettes. Clove cigarettes, whiskey and black-out drunkeness. Giant sunglasses. Black, tattered chuck taylors. Teased, sprayed and dyed hair. I had some pretty ridic hair back then, bouffanted with little girl barrettes and dyed black underneath. And I was also with aspiring gauges. See photo (I'm on the right):
That brings me to Mercy Clothing. Oh my God. You were no one if you didn't model for their t-shirts, or weren't good friends with someone who did. Holy god.

-Let's talk scene love. Average length: three weeks. Need I say more?

-One word: CHRISTCORE. Another one: XANGA.

-Bright Eyes, The Faint, Death Cab, Dashboard Confessional, Ascitiesburn, Lovedrug, The Chariot, The Show is the Rainbow!!, Cursive, The Blood Brothers, Interpol, Throwdown, Winter Solstice,The Postal Service, Underoath, Mewithoutyou. Ohhhh, yeah.



There were both good and bad memories I left behind in Springfield along with the boxes of black hair dye and chunky necklaces. But man, it's gonna be hilarious when my kids are like, "yeah, my mom was a scene kid in high school."



SeeqPod - Playable Search



-pepz

WTF CHRIS BROWN ?!?!!?

Dude you are fucked up !! Poor Rihanna!! How the hell does someone do this to someone?!

Boycotting that shitty Chris Brown's music, sorry Pepper I'm pissed! Instead of kiss, kiss he was slap, slapin'!! 

grey's laterrr.

miss. salt. 

New Tattoo Ideaz.

So I want a new tattoo really really bad. At first I was 100% sure I wanted the large feather below tattooed in the inside of my left arm. BUT then I remembered this really amazing artist Audrey Kawasaki and checked out her site. I found the two paintings below and LOVE them !! I think I like the girl with the feather in her hair the best. I think I might want this one on my left arm too but the back of it. Shit I don't know. I need help deciding. Pepper, help.. !!

miss. salt.

opps.

Yello. Almost the weekend !! Oh yaaa! Even though it's going to be spent shooting a trillion rolls of film and in the darkroom, I'm sure I'll be able to fit a little bit of drinkin' in there to too! So just a little while ago I was sitting in the dark because my lamp on my desk fell and made our entire apartment without electricity. Go me ! After about 20-25 minutes and messing with the breakers the whole time something glorious happened and then there was light ! So I broke, then I fixed.. sort of. May I also note that I don't think I really have an eye infection. I think that they just thought that because my eye was red on Monday from wearing my contacts all weekend. Every time I put the eye drops in they make my eye burn. Umm.. I pray I don't go blind. 

In other news speaking of small children getting impregnated.. a man here in Phoenix escaped from jail today. What did he do you ask? Got a NINE year old pregnant !! Uh, ewwwwww! How do people go through with that shit? YUCK! 

Lastly Shiloh is much cuter than Suri ..I believe. 

Boondock Saints is on lata foolz.

miss. salt

WHY

do my mother's friends add me on Facebook?


-Miss Pepper

the unbearable dorkiness of being

Alright, so it's totally affirmed: I AM A DORK.

I carry around an inhaler. I even have a totally sexy metered one. I'm allergic to everything under the sun- who's ever heard of a Jew with a grape allergy? Seriously. Latex, penicillin, erythomycin, codeine, morphine. I'm allergic to Lil Wayne's life. I'm lactose-intolerant, which means I take lactase tablets before I eat ice cream. I have sensitive skin and ridiculously curly frizz-mess hair.

And to add to my dorkiness, I now have to walk around with crutches. For a whole week. And a sexy, sexy ankle brace. Don't you want to do me?
Don't answer that.


xoxo,
miss pepper

Dudes going to Las Vegas soon?

Well maybe this website well help you find some dirty fun while your there! Bored from playing slots all day? Then start walking the strip and keep your eyes peeled for one of the lovely ladies on the site. There are 50 of them to choose from but ya'll gotta hurry !! Soon their all going to be in jail! So pay for sex while ya can dudes! My favorite of the bunch are, Natalia Montaiva who is 26 and by her picture you can tell looks like a drunken bumble bee who has just recently smoked some crack and Jessica Berumen who is 23. She's quite the charmer !! I just want to know what hair products the beauty uses to make that hair stand still. Also love those eyebrowz so gorgeous. So good luck findin' yourself your very own prostitute !

miss. salt. 

oh and just a bit of advice.. wrap it dudes I'm sure there's a few things floating around... 

#1 Pet Peeve !!

So before I got to college I didn't really have anything that got on my nerves and annoyed the shit out of me. Why? I have two younger sisters and parents who nagged at me all the time. I'm use to it, I love them but family annoys everyone after awhile and that is normal. Now at college I get annoyed with the littlest things but at the same time it's like how can nobody NOT be annoyed with these things? 

Now I share with you my number one pet peeve : 

 

Talking with you mouth full/ licking your fingers/smacking your food. 

Honest to god I did not realize that people still do this over the age of 4. That is until I moved to Arizona and found that people are fucking gross. Two girls I USE to hang out with had the worst eating habits I have ever encountered, both from the East coast. East coast I'm not dissin' but seriously ew. It got so bad when we would go out in public to eat that I would get so embarrassed I'd ask them to chew with their mouth closed politely, they would then think this is hilarious and starting doing it even more thinking they were funny and cute. SO DISGUSTING! I can't handle it. Maybe it's because my mother sent me to manner school at the age of 6 and at the time thought it was stupid but now am thankful.  

For my sake and everyones around you please have some table manners people!

miss. salt.

ps. pepper I'll trade you my shorts for your big coat! I'm over this blazin' heat!

oy veyh.

I feel so retarded today. I've been walking with a limp due to a pretty bad ankle injury (from being retarded and running to class) and then, also being retarded again, took the Q to school, which skipped not only the Avenue H stop, but the Avenue J and Avenue M ones, too. In fact, I should have been in sociology class, talking about Karl Marx and the proletariat, but I was transferring to a Manhattan-bound Q train so I could be thirty minutes for class with my hot French professor.

So now, I have to take my retarded self to the doctor to fix my new pimp-limp. I am also angry about the weather. Lucky-ass Miss Salt gets beautiful hot weather all the time. You know what I get? 28 degrees. I am so not down.

I am, however, down for the spicy vegetable soup I made. It's so delicious. Should not have put pasta in there. That was a bad, mushy move.

Lessons Learned by 3 PM:

Read the goddamn MTA transit advisory signs
Go to the doctor when you sprain your ankle, not 2 weeks later
Don't put pasta in your soup.


-Miss Peppaz

Good Monday !

Have a blingin' Monday ya'll !! Unlike some EVERYONE else in the world I still have class today, wheee ! 

Oh and I found out I have an eye infection, glorious !

miss. salt.

hahaa fashion week i love gawker

miss pepper

president day

Happy President's Day. Fuck everyone, nothing is open. I just wanna go to the library.

-Miss Pepper

update !

never mind. 

i got bored and couldn't sleep.. i now have twitter.

add me bitches. 

i think this will be great when i'm bored out of my mind at a lame party..word.

misssalt.

teach me your ways..

dear pepper, 

 Teach me how twitter works.. should I get one? Is it for me? Fill me in...

  

xoxo

   gossip girl

miss. salt. 

The Clique

I can't even front. I have a horrible weakness for horrible, terrible, lame things. I love Nelly, I love Hostess cupcakes, I love Target. It's true. I also love shitty books, like Gossip Girl, and shitty TV, like Gossip Girl. New episode tomorrow night! I think...

Anyways, there was a period in time in high school where Gossip Girls weren't coming out as fast, and I decided to pick up The Clique. The Clique, written by Lisi Harrison, is pretty much a cattier, more ridiculous and over the top version of Gossip Girl. Pretty much the same main characters, too, Massie Block is the 12-year-old, Westchester version of Blair Waldorf. I kind of liked it though, the characters were endearing and I could read the 200-page books very quickly. Gossip Girl was obvs more fun because the characters had sex and did coke off mirrors in $5000/night hotels, but anyways.

Mama and Papa sent me a gift certificate on iTunes, and instead of buying shitty pop songs like I usually do, I decided to rent some movies. The Dark Knight! I'm so excited to watch that one. And then...I found...THE CLIQUE.

I immediately began squealing. This was better than any vegan quesadilla, and only $2.99 to rent? Hell yeah. So, I downloaded it, watched it, and sort of liked it.

Great costumes, as per usual to any teen chick-lit turned to the screen. It was also very, very true to the book. Very, very few details were changed. The cattiness of the Pretty Committee brought me way back, thinking about how I was totally wearing Old Navy while the other girls wore Limited Too back in middle school. The girls were all melodramatic, but for some reason, it worked in this straight-to-DVD flick more than it did in Gossip Girl. Maybe that's because seventh-grade girls really are the biggest fucking drama queens in the world.

Anyways, it was an alright movie. Something I'd watch with my little cousin. It's not really something one should critique, especially because Tyra Banks produced it. All in all, I say...rent this on iTunes next time you have to chill with your 9-12 year-old cousin/niece/sister, she'll probably love it. And if you are secretly a 9-year-old girl like me, you'll like it too.


-miss peppppppa

ok, listen.

Look, I don't know how I feel about this picnik shit.

You can't front like you don't know what it is. We all know dumb bitches and dumb bitches LOVE picnik. You know, those photos with "best friends 4vr" and stupid clip art shit right? They take it so damn seriously, too, like entire albums jazzed up in picnik.

I have a mac and therefore I do not have MS Paint. MS Paint, back in the day, allowed me to make unflattering pictures of my friends and I into hilarity. Now I can do that on picnik. Please allow me to give you some examples:


So, basically, what I wanted to tell you is that you have absolutely no excuse to use picnik unless you're going to make retarded photos like the above.

-miss pepper

Is it possible ?

Okay so the beginning of this semester I told myself that I was going to go on a diet, exercise regularly and not drink so much to loss some pounds. I mean since freshman year of college I defiantly haven't lost any weight but put on the weight. I live in Arizona where it's hot 24/7 all year round and ride my bike constantly. So the first week went by, I got up and exercised everyday some days even before 7 am so I could go before class. I am even taking a yoga class every Tuesday and Thursday. Exercise first week was great, food wise went well too. I had been reading and following the book Eat Clean Diet by eating high protein mostly chicken, fish, turkey breast, lots of fruits and though I am suppose to eat lots and lots of veggies it's really hard for me. I'm sorry but I hate veggies. I like carrots, corn, potatoes, and the occasional spinach salad (with LOTS of ranch) and since I have to put so much ranch on it it really doesn't do anything for me. ANYWAYS after the first week the weekend came and everything pretty much went to hell. I got wasted, got the drunken munchies and things haven't been the same since. Yes, it's sad. The reason for talking about this is I have a group of friends coming out here March 20th for their spring break. Their going to be staying with me and want to go swimming and all that jazz but me in a bathing suit right now is like a nightmare. SOO is there any possible way I can loss 20-30 pounds in like a month? Is that a stupid goal to want? Tell me how to do it! Oh and without being anorexic, bulimic or snorting coke, thanks !

ps. I really like drinking and cutting that out of my life is not an option. No worries I'm not an alcoholic, promise I just like booze, a lot. 

digging the ankle detector l. lohan !

miss. salt. 

more like miss carnivore

Seriously, I don't get it. I eat a shitload of vegan food all the time and I love meat and eggs and cheese. Maybe it is because one of my good friends is vegan and over here all the time. I don't know but I totes just made a delish quesadilla with hummus, tofu sour cream, rice cheese and whole wheat tortillas. Who am I?

-miss pepper

chris brown

I can seriously not stop listening to "No Air". You know, that song with Jordin Sparks? I don't know. "No Air" , "Run It", "Kiss Kiss", what the hell is wrong with me? The worst part is that the remix of Umbrella he did, Cinderella is stuck so deeply in my head I don't think it's going to go away. Horrible, I am so awful. The weirdest part is that during the No Air video I keep mistaking Jordin Sparks' spoken voice as mine. Seriously, why cant I get, like, Avril Lavigne or something in there? Nope. Fuck you, Chris Brown.

-miss pepperrrr

Things I Lyke !!

So I came across Fionn Regan a few days ago while messing around on some blogs and instantly fell in love with him! He's from Ireland and has this Bob Dylan, Neil Young sound to him. I ended up buying his entire album on iTunes since I couldn't find it anywhere else and it's amazing! A definite favorite of the album is "Put a Penny in the Slot"  it is sooo good! Check him out, I promise you will not regret it! If so I'll buy you an ice cream cone.. maybe. 

probably not though.

miss. salt. 

IT'S FINALLY OVER !

 

Actually to tell you the truth Valentine's Day doesn't really bother me, it's whatever. I spent the night watching some TLC, The Shawshank Redemption, having Cosmo read to me by Chelsea, and getting a stomach ache from eating way to much cheese and chocolate hearts my mom sent me. The only thing that I wish I could have had I didn't was four bottles of André's pink champagne. That would have been pretty grand but I believe I would have probably woken up to drunken text sent to old ex's.. I'm so romantic.   So today while I'm driving back home from north Phoenix I start thinking about all this mushy stuff that comes along with this day. I don't really mind it and it really doesn't make me depressed because I have no one at home holding a bouquet of flowers for me or a stuffed bear that says, "I love you!" when you press the hand but, I start thinking about past dudes I've "crushed" on or had a "thing" with, ones I've kissed, fooled around with, gone all the way with and there is this one dude that keeps sticking out in my mind..Ben. And the entire drive home I continue to ask myself over and over again, " why the hell didn't you go all the way with that dude??" I mean this guy Ben he's a drummer of a somewhat popular band (one I don't really like..whatever) he's fucking hot as hell(I think anyways), super nice, super sweet and it's like uhhh that was a stupid move. What where you thinking? Am I the only one who has regrets like these? surely not. It's just like I look back on it now and it's like wow that sex would have been fucking awesome, I just know it! Maybe if I wouldn't have been SO fucking wasted (proof in picture above) .. guess I'll never know,sadly. Unless someone knows Ben who's reading this and wants to pass along the message I wanna do him. Ya, I'm dead serious. 

 

laterz love birdz. 

miss. salt. 

EVERYONE IN ARIZONA HATEZ ME !

So everyone in Arizona thinks I'm a crazy, for real. I wore this shirt and necklace tonight with some zigzag tights and up rise shorts with my Docs and everyone gave me the weirdest looks. I live in sorority and fraternity hell. It's so fucking annoying I can hardly stand it. Example: three girls live above us and they literally STOMP everywhere they go in their apartment. They drag furniture and laugh and STOMP even more all the time, I don't know them but I hate them. Their in a sorority. Also I'd like to know if at sorority meetings if they practice talking the way they all talk together. It's stupid. My roommate (Chelsea, sorry I forgot to introduce her) and I went to Chili's the other night, two sisters were sitting and sharing nothing but chips and salsa together (What a dinner!!!) talking and talking and talking like they had just arrived on Earth for like the first time EVER!

Example Talk: Girl 1: OMG lyke I can't believe that Josh would do that to you he's like so dumb!
Girl 2: I know, I lyke hate him! My dad said He'd call and talk to him tomorrow!
Girl 1: Why? Gosh I'm lyke so sore from exercising!
Girls 2: Me too, lyke about our relationship... I'm so full from this chips and salsa, good dinner!

Morel of the story... I hate sororities!!
▲▲▲ for life though, always dirty.
dirty trio.
Off to bed for a long time... salt.

the "b" is for bitchmaid

love always, miss pepper (i'm in the pink, obvs)

IF YOU AIN'T DIRTYA, YOU AIN'T HERE TO PARRRTYA !

Hii! I'm drunk here! Wowhee ! Told you! Eating ramen thinking about how awesome I am, ha! So tonight I rediscovered how awesome Jennifer Lopez was. I'm not kidding you!! My favorite song of all time right now is 'I'm Real' featuring JaRule and JLo. I could re-play this song over and over and over again, seriously what happened to JLo?! She has dated some of the sketches guys known to man. Lets re-cap... P.diddy, weird! Her back-up dancer Cris Judd also known as fucking ew ugly face ( she also married this ugly nobody), there's also Ben Afflect which my roommate described earlier while we watched the 'Jenny on the Block' music video as the oddest couple ever... I totally agree, in the music video he touches/slaps her ass like six times! And lastly Marc Anthony like could a couple get any more latino?! Whatever I just want to know what happened to my JLo?? I once adored her and all her songs, 'If You Had My Love', 'Love Don't Cost A Thing', and 'Ain't it Funny'. I mean the bitch use too and might still be?.. a part of Murder Inc. I just want to know JLo what happened to you!?!?? This isn't a joke, I want 'I'm Real' to play at my funeral! ... Did I mention I'm really wasted?!

yes, seriously

omg.
-miss pepper

i'm gonna vom

This kid in England is 13. Look at him. He looks like one of the kids I give cookies to and tell not to pick on the kindergarteners. He's a FATHER. Okay, I grew up in the Ozarks, which are renowned for being full of white trash. And yes, I've seen high school freshman pregnant. I remember walking down the halls of my high school sophomore year and being visually attacked by teenagers with pregnant bellies. I swear, if I see another person from my class of '07 on facebook upload pictures of their child, I'm gonna die.

Sometimes I wonder if they die when they see pictures of me dancing on a chair in my kitchen in my hot-orange hot pants and they're breastfeeding. Or if they die when I upload my latest film and they're changing diapers.

Missbehave posted this article a while back about the ideal life timeline. A lot of people were angered by it, saying it's some sort of conspiracy to make us all be yuppies and blah, blah, the fuck blah blah. You know what I say? Whatever.

I'm down for following that timeline. Shit, I hope to be engaged by 26, in a decent job by 27, married by 28, pregnant by 29 (with twin boys of course) and totally and completely sucessful (in every sense of the word: artistically, financially, familial, etc) by 30. I have nothing wrong with being a mom at 30. Dude, biology is biology.

But common sense is common sense, and why the fuck are 17 year olds having babies? When I was seventeen I was experimenting with partying and hairstyles, crying over boys that were totally fucking lame in retrospect and applying for college.


I don't get it. Sorry, teenage moms. I just don't. I respect you for taking on such a mature task at a very young age, no doubt. Don't get me wrong- I absolutely LOVE children and I seriously can't wait to have kids. But I'll be damned if I have kids before 26.

-miss pepper

Friday the 13th AHH!

Hellooo! Miss Salt here. It's Friday the 13th, fucking awesome I know. I was going to go see Friday the 13th tonight but decided it'll probably be sold out because everyone is dyeing to see another Jason movie. Oh well, I think i'll live.

On another note nothing really totally out of the norm has happened today. I went to an eye appointment earlier because my eye keeps getting all red when I put my contacts in. I have this weird fright of eyes, weird I know. I think it happened when I was in elementary school and everyone on the bus would turn the eyelids inside out and start laughing. I on the other hand would freak out and beg for them to stop doing it. They would continue to harass me putting there nasty flipped eye lids in my face, I would then start kicking and hitting telling them to stop. Eyes freak my the fuck out. So bad that when I got contacts my friend Jordanna would come 20 minutes before school with me to put my contacts in for me. Sad, but true. Also may I note I was a Junior in high school, haha. I can now put my contacts in by myself but hate going to the eye doctor. I'd choose any doctor or dentist appointment any day over the eye doctor. So anyways I found out I'm not going blind, yaya! My contact has to be re-fitted so I get the joy of waking up at 6 am Monday driving to Mesa for yet another eye appoint. Joy, joy ! So until then I have to wear my glasses. I have two pairs both Paul Frank and I like them but want a new pair really really bad! The picture at the top is of the Ray Bans I want, tell me whatcha think! Oh and since I found out I'm not going blind I have decided I'm just going to let my eye get red tonight. I don't want to wear my glasses. So whatever. I'm going to this Devil Lollapalooza thing, yes it's a ripped off festival name and yes it'll probably be very lame (the band Say Anything is playing..yes, I like them.) but living in Arizona you sorta of have to go to whatever comes up because nothing EVER happens here. Yes, Arizona sucks, it's true. Don't believe me? Prove it. 

Okay, I'm going to finish getting ready.. don't be surprised if there's a drunken blog later.. oh and HAPPY FRIDAY THE 13TH ! Hope you don't see a black cat, break a mirror, or knock over the salt!.. How dare you!

valentine's day

Remember these? You picked them out at the grocery store or Duane Reade or what have you, then you had to get a class list and address them to everyone in the class. Then you'd decorate a shoebox or what have you for receiving the valentines. Sometimes there were suckers, other times there were chocolate kisses in the mailbox. Besides dressing up the mailbox, your mom would braid your hair and you'd wear a pink and red headband, and break out those tights with the hearts all over them. Oh, yes, Valentine's Day in elementary was so the best.


I remember when I moved to Springfield in first grade. It was right around Valentine's Day, I think. Anwyays, I totes addressed one of them to this kid, Jake, and I put "I Love You" on the card.

Hopeless romantic at the age of 5. I know, I know. Anyways, Jake and I laugh about it now, but it was mortifying when he told me that he hated me that fateful Valentine's Day of '95. That broke my little heart. But yeah, I still get nervous when I say things on cards, and last night was no exception.

After going to a taping of the Newlyweds Game (eHarmony edition, natch), I went back with my friend to his place. I totally have a crush on his roommate, and love his other roommate, so I figured I'd give them some Claws 'N Paws love.

Right, so I have a crush on my friend's roommate. He'll go unnamed for now. I decided to give him one of the valentines that had a cute bulldog on it. Under the cute puppy, I wrote something. No, not "I Love You", but still elementary school-style: "do you like me?" with two check boxes. One for yes, one for no.

So, said crush did not check either box, but there were a lot of blushing cheeks and awkward, pigeon-toed moments. I'd never felt more like a first-grader in my life. Maybe it was the fact I was wearing a headband and tights again. Maybe it was the fact I had just told someone I liked them on a dinky little piece of paper that said "You're Doggone Cute!".


Yes, I have reverted back to elementary school. I love hearts, conversation and ink ones. I don't have a fancy, glittery mailbox and I sure don't have a valentine. But I've got a lot of love for my friends, a lot of love for my family and a lot of Claws 'N Paws valentines to give out.


Spread love, it's the Brooklyn way.


-miss pepper




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